…today’s dose of vanity (Vol. 1 Issue 2): The Evils of Threading

(TODAY’s DOSE OF VANITY (phrase): a collection of my efforts to scare away my readers by doing either: posting my ugly (don’t worry readers, I have a healthy dose of self confidence); or make like a fashion blogger and post OOTDs (where my usual choice of clothes doesn’t exactly read “Fashion Week”)

Being a woman, while an utterly rewarding, exhilirating and amazing experience, can suck sometimes. OH DON’T GET ME WRONG…I love being a girl and all the shoes and bags and clothes that go with it, but when you are render motionless sometimes due to your monthly period; go through depression because you can’t conceive and a big biological clock seems to hang ominiously in the background…it can get in the way of me being a full-pledged fan of the sisterhood.

And yes, can we even talk about body hair and our need to yank, strip, shave and just get rid of the damn suckers all the time?

Case in point and the reason for this post: I went to my usual spa to have my eyebrows fixed the other day — it’s a very unpleasant experience for me but something I know I must go through in order to curtail the population of bushy-browed women in my office. Threader goes in to work on my eye brows when she noticed the thin and faint layer of fuzz on my upper lip, it’s not really visible but yeah…it’s there. She says, “ma’am do you want your upper lips also threaded?”

Because having my eyebrows threaded is already my idea of eternal damnation, I said no. But then it hit me. If it will just cost a little and will make me a lot more human (a.k.a “prettier”) in the eyes of my long-suffering husband, why the eff not? Surely, threading your upper lip can’t be more painful than cat bite (which I’ve had a few) or worse, a paper cut?

So, after confirming that upper lip threading will cost the same as the eye brow threading, I said yes. With a stern warning that this will be the first time for me and can the attendant be gentler? The kind lady said yes and proceeded to put a thin layer of baby powder on my upper lip. With a few twists of the white thread, she started getting to work.

Owwww. Ouch. Sh*t. It.is.excruciating. What.the…….

Immediately, my eyes started to water — I am tempted to tell the attendant to forget it and leave my faint little upper lip fuzz in freaking peace. But no, my pride and the fact that I will be paying for a job halfway done got in the way, so I decided to grin and bear it. For me, it felt like my cats have declared revolution and decided to gnaw on my upper lip as their form of revenge. Imagine fine thread yanking those tiny buggers off all at the same time.

After about fifteen minutes, it was done. The attendant efficiently moved on to my eyebrows which was not as painful as having the tiny hairs on my upper lip yanked. Trying to force a smile, I closed my eyes and tried to sleep… convinced that threading should be declared as another form of medieval torture.

My go-to place for threading:
Let’s Face It – Glorietta Branch
3F Glorietta Mall (near Gold’s Gym) Makati City
Threading starts at PHP150 (about 3.50USD)

* I am just being creative in describing my experience, but I can assure you that “Let’s Face It” is a nice place and has really efficient staff. They’re my go-to place when I want to look vaguely human. And no, this is not a sponsored post.

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