When I was younger, I used to extremely hate the period when Report Cards were released to my parents. Not because I have atrocious grades, in fact, my grades were out of the ballpark…a line of 90s and 80s that usually drive my parents in a bragging frenzy. As mentioned, I was a hopeless, friendless geek in elementary whose only joy in life is read Sweet Valley Twins.
The part I hate most is when my parents automatically get to the “Remarks” portion of the report card. Usually it’s “Congratulations”, “Needs improvement in Math”, “the best in english”, etc. But when it comes to my report card, one thing was pretty consistent. The remark:
Usually written in offensive red color, announcing to the world and yes, to my parents that I have no ability to shut my trap and that yes, I have a tendency to disrupt the class because while the teacher is slaving away teaching us maths, I will be regaling my classmates with tales about our cats, dogs and yes, Elizabeth and Jessica Wakefield. As I’ve said, The Wakefield Twins were my only friends back in elementary school.
Anyway, that remark was enough to ruin the good mojo brought by my grades. You think my parents would be contented with having a dork as a kid, but no they also want a quiet dork. Preferably one who doesn’t disrupt class.
I had that tag, “Ms. Talkative” my whole elementary years. It was annoying, especially since my grandma (God bless her soul) had this habit of bragging about my grades to the neighbors while announcing that her grand daughter is also “verrrrrrrry talkative! disruptive in classes!” (Yes, being Ilocana, my lola rolls her “rrr’s”) Of course, I was mortified. When, one time I feel asleep on the sofa,the rents had the time to look closely on my face and discovered a small mole on my right lip–they were very quick to deduce that yes, the reason that moi was talkative because I have a mole near my lips. In the Filipino universe, the placement of moles usually explains one’s personality and quirks. Go figure.
I managed to avoid the “talkative” tag in secondary school and university because I managed to fly under the radar.
Fast forward to more than twenty years. In exact, yesterday. I managed to lose my voice after screwing up with my health in the last two weeks. Got an icky bout with cough and flu (the kind that involve sticky body fluids) and to further retaliate, my voice decided to file an early leave and join the rest of humanity celebrating the Holy Week.
Yet in spite my inability to speak, I kept on yakking for the last two days. I just can’t shut up, giving unsolicited views, bossing the Hubby, screaming due to the cats and yes, even ordering people around at work. I just can’t really shut my trap.
So, yes — I don’t have any voice at all. I lost it and have no idea when it’s coming back. Maybe I should finally shut up?