Happy New Year!
I hope you had a great new year — mine was typical but always happy. I am not really into fancy parties and as long as I get to celebrate the New Year with my family and my husband — I am a happy girl.
Tradition dictates that I must have a New Year’s resolution on account of it being the New Year. I stopped making them about three years ago because I never got to follow them anyway. But I am determined to make this year different.
I figured that if it’s really the end of the world (hehe!) I might as well make 2012 a blast and stop being your happy little pessimist. So, yeah — I am listing things that I want to do this year, changes that I want to make for myself and the things that I resolve to be, well at least things start going Inception or 2012 on us.
I will also not call them “resolutions” cos the bad thing with happy a New Year’s Resolution is the struggle of not having to break them and going through the same old shite again for 2013.
Let’s call them….”The List”
1. I will stop swearing like a sailor. It’s just disgusting. Maybe I can tone down my being a potty mouth, have a few, choice cuss words which I can unleash during moments of rage and loathing? I am saying this because I realized I swear a lot. Like a LOT. I swear when I am happy, sad, disgusted, amazed, apathetic or even telling a story. At my age, it’s just not good to look at, or even hear. I also do not want to fool myself and say, yeah I will no longer swear but start blasting cuss words the moment I turn off this laptop. Maybe I’ll stick with the crappy word and its various antecedents?
2. I will learn to say “no”. Tough-sounding as I maybe, I can be a push-over sometimes. The reason? I don’t want to hurt people’s feelings by saying “no”. So, I have a tendency to say “yes” even if by doing so:
a) I will look like a total idiot
b) I will go through hell and be miserable and unhappy
c) I will risk my personal safety and happiness in the process
This is something that I’d really like to succeed in doing. So please pray for me that I start knowing how to say N.O.!
3. Dress as appropriately as possible when it comes to work wear – I have in my mind a five year career plan with my current company. If I want to make at least even an iota of that possible, I have to start looking less like a cosplayer and be more of a manager. People sometimes find it hard to take me seriously and go beyond the funky dress and stockings combo. I have to make see that I effing mean business.
4.Learn to spend money on really important things…no matter how much they cost. Define important? Fixing my teeth (the reason why all my Holiday 2011 photos showed me looking happily in the camera and smiling mysteriously–why? cos I have miserable front teeth!), going through fertility work-ups, having my constant tummy ache checked–> those things are important. But these things: Limited Edition Japan Barbie, CanCam December 2011, dubious protein shakes are not really important. If you find yourself snickering, kindly note that these are some of my real-life purchases for 2011. All them cost me my weekly baon budget. I am not including on my list impulse purchases of shoes and bags cos these things are very important to me.
5. Be more patient with my mother. Because one day, I will also be a mother to a smart-aleck, foul-mouthed firstborn and I will realize how much it will hurt to bring such a stubborn child into the world.
I am writing these things here out in the open so that I may always be reminded of the things I promised I will do. Hopefully this will not be a one time thing. Hopefully, I can deliver.
“People always arrive at the right moment at the place where someone awaits them…”
— Paulo Coelho, “The Pilgrimage”