rub-a-dub-dub…i’d still gow for my original veetches…

I am a closet nationalist yet sadly, I am not a big fan of Tagalog movies.

Call me any name in the non-patriotic section of the rule book and I’d willingly take it cos its the truth. I’d rather watch Japanese or Korean movies, or the occasional Hollywood fare than spend my hard-end money on formulaic sappy Tagalog movies that never fail to make me cringe. Don’t get me wrong, there are Tagalog movies that is worth watching (most of them were made in the 80s, and are works of the great Lino Brocka) though I also love Gangland, La Visa Loca, Serbis, Caregiver, Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros and Bata, Bata, Paano ka Ginawa, to name a few. But the local mainstream fare usually shown in cinemas usually bore me to tears.

But bar none–number 1 list of favorite tagalog movies is the campy, sexy 80s flick, “Temptation Island”. Who would forget these lines?

“Alam mo bang mahirap ma-achieve ang GOLDEN TAN?”
“Sabihin mo sa driver, ilabas ang Mercedez na Charcoal Gray!”
“Walang tubig…walang pagkain…magsayaw na lang tayo” (There’s no water, there’s no food, let’s just dance)

All these lines were delivered with such aplomb and seriousness that it’s freaking hard not to like the actresses who deliver them. I love watching Temptation Island and can watch this movie even everyday.

And of course, the lines from my favorite scene:

“It must have been failing eyesight”
“Really now? 20-20 yata ang vision ko!”
“Oh really…I thought that was your bust line. Sabagay hindi din kita napansin, ang pandak-pandak mo. Eh kasi tatabi-tabi ka with my towering height, so it must have been my fault after all, veeeeetch!”
“Double veeeetch!”
“Rub-a-dub-dub! Two vitches in a tub!”


As the bitchy socialite Suzanne puts it, “What are veeetches for, but to veeetch around with fellow veeetches!”

With the film earning pop-culture status, it is only a matter of time before someone stumbles upon the idea or remaking the original–thus presenting “Temptation Island 2011”

I wish I can say it’s as funny and campy as the original — but the trailer falls flat for me. Marian Rivera seemsfunny though–see her at the 1:33 mark to know what I mean. However–to be fair–I haven’t seen this yet so it’s really not for me to say if it’s really good since my judgement is based on a two-minute trailer. Thing is,. I might have to wait another year before I can watch this since I don’t have any plans of spending PHP140 just to watch this on the big screen. Will just wait for the time this will air on a local channel.

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