Waiter, there’s a baby cockroach walking in my pasta…

I used to balk at the idea of finding something in my food. You know the usual horror stories or urban legends dealing with food: a half-cooked rat in a bucket of chicken (euuuw, i know), cockroaches in pasta take-out, a boiled lizard in a bowl of soup. Horror stories that can make you lose your lunch, dinner or your appetite altogether.

Well, guess what I almost ate earlier at the FRENCH BAKER branch in Megamall Building B (GROUND FLOOR)..

Excuse the crappy picture quality, cos it was taken using my Blackberry, and I am VERY STUPID when it comes to gadgets. But yeah, that is not fried garlic or decoration, that is a (previously alive) baby cockroach who died by accidental drowning on the heavy cream.

Did I say previously alive??? YES. Cos as I was about to get a big heap of pasta from my plate, I saw the EFFING CRAWLIE walking happily on my bacon, I can practically see it’s teeny legs dancing and doing the macarena while walking from point A to B. I didn’t know why it died though, maybe it’s allergic to cream?

If you will ask if I made a scene, no…I called the guard, showed him the dancing crawlie and asked for the manager. After about FOREVER, this surly looking girl with the most unsympathetic face came up to me and said: “ano maam…i-rerefund na lang ba namin pera mo or order kayo bago?” My inner bitch kicked in and started asking her questions. SHE WAS F@CKING ANNOYING! Then I said, “it’s a good thing I saw it, pag nakain ko ba yan and I get sick…I will f@cking sue the hell out of you and this company!”

Did you know what she said: “Sure ma’am, but there’s still a lot of test to check kung yan nga ang source…” What the f@ck????? I told her to get out of my face, DO NOT TOUCH THE PLATE (she attempted to get it) and give me her manager cos she is just irritating me and she doesn’t know shit about what she’s saying.

And then it took me another 10 minutes for the manager to appear.

In fairness, the manager is more tolerable and commendable than the snooty assistant. He gave me back my money, presented me muffins (which I initially declined) and explained that the errant insect might be from the Parmesan cheese which I requested. And quite honestly, I really think so too. But that is not the issue. The issue is the QUALITY AND SANITATION of the food they serve and what are they doing to ensure customer’s health is their top priority.

I asked the manager for the contact details of the main office because I intend to write their customer service not only because of the errant insect which died a creamy death in my carbonara, but also to inform them about the snooty assistant manager who don’t know about assuaging an angry customer.

In the end, I accepted the manager’s explanation and left. I didn’t want to make a scene because I really don’t believe that it can answer questions or solve the problem at hand. I always eat at French Baker and I know that this maybe an isolated incident. However, they really should check their kitchens, their trays and even their condiment racks for cockroaches and other bugs. Who knows, the next customer might not be as kind and diplomatic as me.