Make Facebook moron-free!!!

There are amazing things in this world that one shouldn’t take advantage of, like wealth, the law and even money. One of them is Facebook. Like any other thing of beauty, Facebook–when in the hands of a very stupid and moronic person–becomes cheap, uncouth and at times, even annoying.

I decided to unfriend one of my college friends in Facebook after she has sent me a stupid chain letter (sent via Instant Messaging) urging me to “pass it on or else, your mom will die” First and foremost, I know it’s just a message and is not meant to be taken seriously but the fact that it has even mentioned my mom in bad faith did not sit too well with me. I mean, WHO THE F@CK DOES STUNTS SUCH AS THESE? Mostly just kids and oh, the morons that were too busy simply by existing. I would like to know the genius that made this chain letter so that I could stuff his laptop up his ass, and yes — I would like to see this girl from college, who I barely talked to (in person and online) and when she decided to talk to me (for once), she managed to ruin my day by sending me a stupid chain letter online.

The funny thing is, when she sent me the letter (via Facebook chat) she explained that she said, “I am sorry I am doing this cos I love my mom” I immediately replied, “fuck off. this is not funny. If you love ur mom you would stop doing stupid things online” (Yes, I really told her this…including the fuck off part). She immediately went offline.

This annoying little incident made me think that when Mark Zuckerberg invented Facebook (incidentally, I think I am one of the ten people who haven’t seen The Social Network yet), I don’t think that he has any idea on how big this thing will be, or that somewhere across the planet in a country called the Philippines, a moron would use his invention to send stupid stuff to people. Come to think of it, Facebook has become a haven of both GOOD and STUPID stunts.

Here are some of the really annoying, bizarre and even stuff I’ve seen posted on my Wall:

1. It has become a marketplace where people sell a lot of stuff where they tag you even if your face or your likeness isn’t anywhere near a picture of yapping puppies or dresses from Korea. For my FB friends, for the love of God — please do not tag me if the picture does not include my VERY PRESENTABLE and WELL-MADE UP face, or if the picture does not concern my interests (I.E> my MatsuJun, Korean boytoys, Japanese idols, boybands, etc). If you are really my friend, you know WHEN to tag me.

2. It became an exhibition wall for the bizarre. Have you seen the video of the guy whose body was cut in two but was still moving? Or the video where 20+ giant worms where extracted from the stomach of a patient, obviously in a hospital somewhere in the Philippines cos you can hear the nurses screaming (in a very annoying and maarte way) “eeeuwwww…” each time a worm was pulled (threats of medical malpractice people!) or the video claiming me to be the body of the half serpent/ half human monster living in the basement of a Manila mall? Yes, the wall of Filipino Facebook users have become a display wall of just how charmingly weird my countrymen are.

3. Two people fighting, nuking it out with messages exchanged. On the Facebook Wall. Live. Bringing into the whole world’s attention just how effed up their lives were.

4. Have someone asked you for money on FB? (In tagalog: nautangan ka na ba sa Facebook?) don’t you find it weird? I do. It’s like, dude…we haven’t seen each other for eons and you are messaging me just to borrow money. Oh….kaaaay.

Writing this piece has made me realize that I have been “friends” with a lot of weird people in FB. Does that mean I am weird too… (heh–you don’t have to answer that). Hmmmn, must clean up my friends list then.

You know sometimes I think Mark Z. and his crew should devise a test if someone can join Facebook or not. This will limit the number of stupid things present in cyberspace. A moron-free Facebook, wouldn’t you want that?

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